run

you lace up your shoes. put your hair in a ponytail. and you go out. start walking. you’re walking faster. and faster. and faster. then you took that bigger step. then you started running. you can feel your every breath. it’s getting more and more rapid. your heart beats faster. faster. faster. you can feel it. the rush of blood. the rising body temperature. the burning sensations in your chest. the pain you feel on your thigh. yet you keep on running. adrenaline rush. you keep on running. faster. faster.

then you got tears, in the corner of your eyes. streaming down your pale face. to the corner of your lips. it tastes salty. but you don’t give a fuck. you kept on running. further. further. further away.

because it’s all you can do. running. because it’s all you want. running. away from your life. away from your responsibilities. away from your failure. away from the loves and friendships.

but you know you can never make it. at least not now.

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Maka Ada-mu pun Fana Adanya

baru saja kuguratkan aksara membentuk namamu diatas pasir, ombak datang bergulung menghapus tiap jejak namamu. mengirimkannya ke palung terdalam lautan.
baru saja kusiulkan namamu ke udara, angin bertiup menerbangkan lafal namamu ke ruang hampa. laju menjauh secara konstan.
baru saja kurajahkan namamu dalam jiwaku, namun jiwaku pun kini turut mengembara, jauh, jauh, menuju ketiadaan. tak tersentuh. tak tergapai.

hingga kutemui namamu tiada. jadilah kamu rupa tak bernama. tersesat dan terasing. punah dalam pusaran kehidupan. meninggalkan pusara. tak bernama.

ah, dunia memang fana adanya.